Beautiful elderly couple photo session. An elderly couple living separately from their adult children. Stage. Family formation

Now the young are able to provide themselves financially, while the older generation receives a pension and other types of social assistance. All this contributes to the relative material independence of generations from each other. In this regard, the need for cooperation is reduced, and thus family solidarity and mutual dependence are destroyed.

Currently, the process of dismemberment of a complex family is progressing, and this leads to the fact that more and more often we meet families consisting of one elderly married couple, but after a certain time, as a result of the death of one of the spouses, the family ceases to exist, a “single person” appears. But before that, the family life of the old people continues, approaching their golden wedding, and they are more touching and more reverent to each other, there are more signs of attention.

With age, both spouses change: masculine qualities fade, the former attractiveness of the spouse disappears, the opposition of male and female roles becomes less and less noticeable. Spouses acquire a common language, become relatives not by blood, but by long years lived, by way of life and thought, by views, habits and tastes. Even in former conflict families, strife subsides. Each of the spouses is able to predict alternative behavioral reactions of the other and to model their own behavior. However, it would be a mistake to think that older spouses do not need to adapt to each other. In old age, under the influence of subjective and objective circumstances, there are quite natural deterioration in vision, hearing, taste, slowing down of reactions, changes in appearance, gait, etc. All this is reflected in the character and manner of behavior. To himself, a person may seem to have changed a little, while a partner fixes all these changes and he needs efforts to adapt to new situations.

It also does not mean that the life of elderly spouses is always conflict-free. Neither age nor family history provides guarantees of peace and harmony. For example, Leo Tolstoy left Sofia Andreevna at 82, having lived with her for 48 years.

V.D. Alperovich (1998) proposed the following typology of relations between elderly spouses: coexists, partners-competitors, friends in love.

To type coexiststhere are couples who live together as if out of habit, over a long life they have accumulated so many resentments against each other that under their burden the original feeling that once united these people was forgotten. The spouses no longer sort things out, because there is no relationship, they are absolutely indifferent to each other. How do these couples come about? Aristophanes, the creator of the myth of the two halves, explained through the mouth of Plato: they were not united by their halves and did not form a unity. Modern Platons give another explanation: they could not overcome the barriers of alienation, their aspirations, attitudes, characters turned out to be multidirectional.

The second type is competing partners.These people once, in their young and mature years, were united by some common occupation, perhaps a specialty. Together, they made a good tandem, moving up to the heights of a career. They constantly made sure that any work, including domestic work, was carried out on an equal footing. In old age, when career motives were a thing of the past, joint successes lost their value and only boredom from monotony remained, mutual reproaches in choosing an easier task for themselves, in violation of the basic partnership agreement.

The third type is friends in love.Relationships built on love and friendship, these people managed to carry through their whole lives. About such an elderly couple, Andre Maurois wrote: “Such spouses are not afraid of boredom ... Why? Because each of them knows so well what exactly may interest the other, because both have such similar tastes that the conversation between them never stops. A walk together for them is just as dear as hours of love visits were dear to them in their time ... Everyone knows that the other will not only understand him, but guess everything in advance. At the same time, both are thinking about the same things. Everyone just physically suffers because of the moral experiences of the other. "

As a rule, lonely old people live in worse economic and living conditions than family ones.

Quite often, loneliness leads to suicidal behavior. Both men and women have a high enough risk of suicide in the event of the loss of one of the spouses or another relative. To endure the death of a loved one, to survive it is the most powerful stressful factor in life. In general, 25% of suicides are associated with irreversible loss: death or death of a loved one.

The family becomes the main deterrent to suicidal behavior in the elderly. It should build relationships based on personal responsibility for the well-being of everyone and everyone, striving to alleviate the plight of older people.

Characteristically, older people tend to value very highly their family relationships and the quality of the help they receive from their families. It should be borne in mind, however, that leaving close people in itself evokes natural gratitude in a helpless person, maintaining his confidence that he takes his rightful place in the family and enjoys love and respect. There are also cases of family refusal to care for the elderly.

12.4. Relationship of older people with relatives

Statistics show that about half of elderly people have adult children aged 45-50 years. This significantly affects their relationship. We can talk about equal interaction between adults, which can result in a better understanding of old people by adult children, but if the parents maintain authoritarianism, it can cause sharp conflicts, often ending in a complete breakdown of relations.

Meanwhile, with aging, the role of the family in the life of an elderly person increases: the termination of work when reaching retirement age, deterioration of health often occurring during this period and an increasing decrease in mobility limit the interests and activities of older people, all their attention is switched to family affairs. At the same time, family contacts replace other lost contacts.

E. Vovk (2005) writes that it is customary for us to grow old in the family, in the circle of relatives. A common image of a prosperous old age: a grandmother and / or grandfather are babysitting their grandchildren. However, here there is also a contradiction in views on the intrafamily interaction of the elderly and their descendants. There is one stereotype: old people need the company of their children and grandchildren much more than children and grandchildren need the company of their elderly parents and grandparents. Another stereotype: children and grandchildren are a burden for the elderly, without whose help and participation the young have a hard time.

The data testify, writes E. Vovk, that it is wrong both to limit the vital interests of the elderly exclusively to the family circle, and the idea of \u200b\u200bmutual alienation of generations. There is no need to speak of an interaction as close as in an extended family, but it is hardly possible to speak of a complete nuclearization of the family.

Cohabitation of the elderly with their families has both positive and negative aspects.

A significant moment in the life of older people is the loss of a leading role in the family: when deciding important issues, their opinions are considered less and less. This is especially difficult for the head of the family (an elderly father or grandfather: after all, from time immemorial, the head of the family was always an older man, whose word was law for family members). And the weakening of health, increasing over the years, physical decrepitude in general, put the elderly person in dependence on other family members, since he needs their help and care. With a family, seniors and seniors can hope for safety and independence from the difficulties they face. Therefore, there are often cases when there is a reunion of elderly parents who cannot serve themselves with children. More often the daughter takes care of and reunification with the parent (Brody et al., 1987; Gatz et al., 1990; Spitze, Logan, 1990). The same applies to daughters-in-law (Globerman, 1996).

In addition, by doing all possible housework, helping the rest of the family with housekeeping and caring for children, the elderly person gains a sense of confidence in their usefulness, which helps him to some extent adapt to the old age. Full participation of an elderly person in family life can serve as the best remedy for “retirement illness”. After all, a family can not only provide pensioners with direct and indirect economic support and provide various kinds of social and domestic services, providing the necessary level of consumption and comfort, conditions for leisure and recreation, but also the possibility of purposeful, meaningful and useful activities, intensive and, which is especially important , intimate interpersonal communication. Of particular importance for the elderly are the love, respect and caring attitude of children and grandchildren, the recognition of parental authority by children, and a high assessment of what a father or mother has done for them. By participating in family decision-making, the elderly maintain their prestige, and by discussing their non-family activities with younger family members, they use their experience, including professional experience. In a family, a pensioner, in addition to his own, also uses her social contacts, which allows him to lead a more active lifestyle. Thus, the importance of the family as the closest social environment, the immediate microenvironment is not only fully preserved, but also sharply increased with the abandonment of work (V.D.Shapiro, 1980).

However, elderly people living with the families of their sons or daughters face household chores because they cannot manage their time in the way they would like. And physical activity with constant communication with grandchildren is far from optimal for many elderly grandparents. As a result of this "well-deserved rest" often does not work.

The real intra-family situation that pensioners face after leaving work is not perceived by all of them as favorable. Hence the discrepancy between the actual family functions of older people and their predisposition to this kind of activity. This can lead to their dissatisfaction with their new position in the family and a source of tension with children.

Value orientations indicate not only the willingness of older people to do something for the family, to compromise their interests for the good of children, but also the desire to receive moral support from them, or at least simple human gratitude.<…> The joy of constant communication with children often forces you to make a certain compromise, limiting the satisfaction of other needs and taking on additional responsibilities at home. But often, removing the burden from children around the house, older people sacrifice their health, rest, communication and other values \u200b\u200bthat are important to them. At the same time, some older people are confronted with misunderstanding from younger relatives, who believe that the family should be almost the only object of interests of the elderly person, and take his contribution for granted.

L.B.Schneider, 2000.

But the departure of matured children from home is also perceived ambiguously by elderly parents. Separation from the parental home of the only or last child causes grief, sadness, and unhappiness in parents (Harris et al., 1986; Rubin, 1980). At first, the "abandoned nest" syndrome occurs: parents begin to feel emptiness and loneliness. At the same time, they have the freedom to use their time, expand the possibilities of their personal life, to satisfy their interests (Alpert, Richardson, 1980; Cooper, Guttman, 1987).

Abandoning parental responsibilities in connection with the growing up of children leads older parents to greater satisfaction with their marriage, however, in the first period after the children leave from parental shelter, difficulties may arise in adapting older spouses to each other in new living conditions. They are looking forward to their grandchildren, as they want to return to parenting. They feel a responsibility to help their children, look after their young grandchildren, although they have some doubts about whether they interfere too often in their lives (Blieszner, Manchini, 1987; Greenberg, Becker, 1988; Hagestad, 1987).

The studies conducted by sociologists have shown that in our country the majority of elderly people (56%) live with their children, and 45% of such families have grandchildren, 59% of pensioners have a spouse. Singles make up 13%.

Only 46% of single old people maintain close contact with relatives, 39% of communication is reduced to rare telephone conversations.

In recent years, there has been a growing tendency for adult children to move away from their parents, sometimes only physically, but more often out of an emotional need to be themselves and to have the time and opportunity to deal with their own problems and relationships. Life in I has become more important than life in Us. This leads to the disintegration of the family. Whereas earlier the young, helping the elderly in much closer contact, were internally involved not only in their weaknesses and illnesses, but also in the richness of their experience and the strength of their feelings, now generations live much more distant and isolated. Social alienation was also added to bodily and spiritual alienation (I. Kemper, 1996).

Cohabitation

The respondents' answers to the question of which sides - positive or negative - are more in a situation where elderly people live with their children and grandchildren, were divided almost equally (although our fellow citizens nevertheless chose the second option a little more often). When it comes to the interests of older people, 40% of respondents see more bad things for them in living together with their children and grandchildren, and 36% of respondents see more good things. When it comes to children and grandchildren, 43% see more bad things in living together with elderly relatives, and 34% see more good things. As we can see, in the opinion of the respondents, both the old and the young gain and lose from living under the same roof to approximately the same extent.

In general, the elderly and young people demonstrate fairly similar ideas about the favorable and unfavorable living together.

But in those cases when grandparents and grandchildren talk about living together not hypothetically, but based on personal experience, their assessment changes and the views of generations on the situation differ. Grandchildren who live with their grandparents rate the benefits for old people twice as high as the respondents in the sample as a whole, and noticeably higher than the grandparents themselves. Grandparents, in turn, value the benefits that they receive from living together higher than grandchildren.

In other words, in a situation of cohabitation, each of the parties begins to believe that the other receives the main benefits and that he personally gives more than he receives - a fertile ground for conflicts.

In some cases, the old people’s reasoning about the disadvantages of living together is somewhat declarative, and, finding themselves in such a situation, some of them tend to reconsider their point of view. It is also obvious that cohabitation is more comfortable for the elderly than for the young: the latter, in this case, as a rule, do not find anything good for themselves and retain the same point of view on the advantages and disadvantages of such a life model.

The assumption that cohabitation is more beneficial for the elderly is supported by other data. When asked directly about this, 33% of grandparents expressed a desire to live under the same roof with their grandchildren, while among grandchildren, only 18% of respondents indicated this desire (57% of grandparents and 65% of grandchildren would prefer to live separately). In addition, grandmothers and grandfathers, living together with their grandchildren, are more often the latter in favor of maintaining this state of affairs.

The main argument in favor of living together is the physical, psychological and existential lack of self-sufficiency of the elderly, their dependence on younger family members. This follows from the answers of the respondents to the open question, in what they see the positive aspects of living together for the elderly; respondents referred to the need of old people for care (12%), for attention and communication, which would relieve them of the feeling of loneliness (11%), would bring joy into their life and give it meaning (5%).

But along with the recognition of the importance of living together with the elderly, there is also a rather pronounced tendency to cavtonomization. Both the old and the young do not often demonstrate a desire to live under one roof - both of them talk quite a lot about the disadvantages of living together for both sides, and among those living together, both old people and grandchildren in almost half of the cases would like to leave.

The noted desire to live separately should not be mistaken for the complexities of intergenerational interactions. Three quarters of respondents who have grandchildren say it is easy for them to find a common language, and less than one fifth say it is difficult. The problem is, rather, in another - in the unwillingness of the difficulties that inevitably arise when people of different habits, attitudes and lifestyles converge in one small apartment and in one family. Those who believe that cohabitation with children and grandchildren brings the elderly more bad (as we recall, 40% of the sample), spoke about the discrepancy between the interests and views of “fathers and children” (8%), about the difference in lifestyle (8 %).

Many indicated that when living together, each generation seeks to impose its own rules on the other (5%) and as a result, quarrels and conflicts arise from scratch (6%).

Some of the survey participants emphasized that cohabitation brings unnecessary worries and troubles for the elderly (4%).

Living together really creates the ground for conflicts: each of the parties begins to believe that they give a lot, but receive little. In this context, the desire for autonomy is the desire to minimize intra-family conflicts by limiting contacts and points of contact. This attitude towards maximum conflict-free communication between the elderly and the young, while unwilling to "rub in" each other and sacrifice their comfort for the sake of living together, deserves special attention.

It is also significant that a joint life and close contact between generations are needed by old people not much more than young people, but young people - not much less than their “ancestors”. From this it follows, by the way, that by no means always (and not even in most cases) in old age the meaning of life is seen solely in children and grandchildren. In the opinion of many respondents, older people are completely self-sufficient people, with their own way of life, interests, values \u200b\u200band plans.

E. Vovk,2005.

Most older people have complex, varied relationships with their families. In modern society, responsibility for the elderly is becoming formal, ritual and depersonal. Considering the modern family in our society, M.D. Aleksandrova (1974) points out that old people - fathers of the family do not play the same role and the younger generation does not need the support of old people. Meanwhile, the ideal of existence for the elderly is close social ties with a sufficiently high level of independence, that is, a rational combination of family care and personal autonomy. Therefore, many grandparents form strong friendships that turn into love and close affection with their grandchildren. Many grandparents, in the event of a divorce or other problems, become “surrogate parents” for their grandchildren, taking full responsibility for their upbringing. However, according to 59% of young spouses, the level of participation of their parents (grandparents) should be regulated, that is, parents should help only at the request of the spouses; and 14.5% of respondents believe that help is possible only in extreme cases, or that it should not be at all (O.B. Berezina, 2010). Samara gerontologists revealed an interesting fact: the state of health of elderly people living separately and independently, but not far (in the same settlement) from their relatives, is better than that of retirees living with their children's families. Consequently, gerontologists believe, older people should take independent care of themselves as long as possible and live separately. However, in the end there comes a period when the old person is not able to satisfy his needs - physical and mental decrepitude puts him in complete dependence on others. Studies show that 80% of people aged 75 and over cannot do without outside help (V. Sokolov, 2002).

It has been suggested that there are four important, but often mostly symbolic, roles played by the parents of the parents (Bengson, 1985).

Presence.Sometimes grandparents say that the most important thing for grandchildren is their simple presence. It has a soothing effect when there is a threat of family breakdown or external disaster. Grandparents are a symbol of stability for both grandchildren and their parents. In some cases, they can even serve as a deterrent to family breakdown.

Family "National Guard". Some grandparents report that their main function is to be with their grandchildren in emergencies. At such times, they often go far beyond mere presence and move to active leadership of their grandchildren.

Arbitration.Some grandparents see it as their role to discuss and agree on family values, maintain family integrity, and help keep generations connected during conflicts. While different generations often have different values, some grandparents find it easier for them to resolve conflicts between their grown children and grandchildren because they have more experience. In addition, they can look at the conflict from the outside.

Family history preservation.Grandparents are able to create a sense of continuity and family unity by passing on family heritage and traditions to their grandchildren.

G. Craig, D. Bocum,2004.S. 700.

The relationship between daughter-in-law and mother-in-law.Life experience shows that in an extended family, that is, when newlyweds live with the parents of one of the spouses, the relationship is not the son-in-law and mother-in-law, but the daughter-in-law and mother-in-law. Here is one of the typical monologues on this subject: Zoya, 26 years old, an economist by education: “My mother-in-law constantly interferes in my relationship with my husband. In her opinion, I am doing everything “wrong”! I cook poorly, I do not know how to run a household, I pay little attention to my husband. Recently she said that she wants me and my daughter to leave her apartment ... We moved to my parents, and my husband stayed with his mother. When I got married, I thought that I would be behind my husband like a stone wall, but he did not even protect me! My husband betrayed me and his child! Now I am at a loss ... I feel terribly lonely ... All my feelings for my husband are mixed ... I don't know how we can live on ... "

In many cases these conflicts destroy the family. In Italy, for example, one third of all divorces occur for this reason. The study of this issue by TV Andreeva and LN Savina (2000) showed that just over half of the daughters-in-law perceives the mother-in-law as a stranger; 83% of daughters-in-law consider their mother-in-law authoritarian; 70% are unresponsive and expect more self-sacrifice from her. The daughters-in-law would like to see the mother-in-law compliant, meek, accommodating, sincere, disinterested. It is possible that the expectation of a large manifestation of these qualities leads to an inadequate assessment of them in the mother-in-law.

"I am twenty years old. Probably, I will soon get married, - writes Natasha S. from Astrakhan to the magazine "Krestyanka". - Using the experience of my mother's three daughters-in-law, I decided to create rules for the future daughter-in-law.

1. I will treat my mother-in-law with respect, I will always remain attentive and kind, even if I know that she did not want to take me as a daughter-in-law. It is not her fault that her son fell in love with the wrong one she dreamed of.

2. I will not speak badly about my mother-in-law to people, especially my husband, so as not to hurt his heart, knowing that his mother is as dear to him as my mother is to me.

3. I will be sincerely happy if she teaches me something, which I do not know yet.

4. I will not boast of excellence in education. I will try to give in to her in the name of family happiness and peace of mind, given her middle age and state of health.

5. I will never demand material assistance and I will not be stingy with gratitude if my mother-in-law helps in any way she can.

6. I will never reproach my mother-in-law if my mother “gave more”, “did better”. I myself will give my mother-in-law and my mother the same.

7. I will trust the mother-in-law of my children as myself, as my mother.

8. If my relationship with my husband deteriorates, I will not blame his mother. I will not run to my father's house, to my mother, but go to consult my mother-in-law. She will appreciate this and will try to guide her son, if necessary.

V. T. Lisovsky,1986.S. 166.

The husband considers his mother to be more dependent and altruistic than his wife. In general, this is not surprising: the positions of the husband and wife are different. The son evaluates his mother in relation to himself, and the daughter-in-law in relation to her own children, and this attitude does not always suit her.

The reasons for unfavorable relations are called: dissatisfaction of the mother-in-law with the choice of her son, different family structures and outlooks on life, too much love of the mother for her son and her interference in the affairs of the spouses, the personal qualities of the mother-in-law (despotism, importunity) and daughter-in-law (resentment, negativism), lack of necessary help and attitude towards grandchildren.

A son can also make his "contribution", in a fit of falling in love with his wife, violating the previously established relationship between him and his mother. Inhibited in her rights to be the mistress of her own home, suddenly deprived of the manifestation of warmth on the part of her son, to whom she gave her life, the mother sees the reason for all these changes not in her son, but in her daughter-in-law. Hence the enmity towards her.

In a conflict between the daughter-in-law and the mother-in-law, the husband-son is in the most difficult position (as if between two millstones). His most optimal position is to fulfill the role of a "peacemaker", a "buffer", when a man, without withdrawing from the relationship, does not take sides, listening to the reproaches and claims of each and not passing one of the parties the opinion of the other.

In this situation, the daughter-in-law needs to be patient. Perhaps, in a few years, when the mother-in-law's reproductive functions gradually begin to “fall asleep,” her hormonal background will change, jealousy of her daughter-in-law because of her son will disappear, peace will come, and the mother-in-law will help to raise her grandchildren. However, it is best for young people to live separately from their parents.

Stage. Stabilizing or raising children.

Stage. Family formation.

The main task is to adapt spouses to the role of parents, reorganize family relationships, taking into account the needs of the baby and preschooler.

The task of the spouses is to educate children of preschool and adolescence, prepare them for an independent life.

Its beginning is the departure from the parental home of the last of the children, and the end is the death of one of the spouses. On this day, this family ends its life cycle.

Naturally, the description of the stage is only a diagram, since separation is possible only in a one-child family. In the presence of two or more children, the stages overlap.

V. A. Sysenko grouped all marriages as follows:

1. Very young: from 0 to 4 years old.

2. Young: 5-9 years old.

3. Average: 10-19 years old.

4. Seniors: 20 or more.

Very young marriages are characterized by the initial entry into each other's world, the distribution of labor and responsibilities in the family, the solution of financial, housing and problems related to the maintenance of a common household and everyday life, entering the role of husband and wife, growing up and maturing. This period of marriage is the most difficult and dangerous from the point of view of family stability.

Young marriages are inherent in the problems associated with the birth and upbringing of children, the tension of the budget of time, a sharp restriction of leisure, an increase in physical and nervous fatigue. All this is superimposed on love and the formation of conjugal friendship.

Psychologically, the essence of these two stages is reduced to a complex and varied process of adaptation of spouses to each other and to a joint lifestyle. It is known, unfortunately, that 65% of divorces occur in the first 10 years of marriage. And according to the classification of V. A. Sysenko, this is typical for "very young" marriages.

Therefore, the adaptation of spouses in a moral sense is especially important, this implies a discussion and understanding of the mutual actions of spouses in terms of "for the family - against the family", as well as the consistent and purposeful merging of two "I" into one "we", merging, with a qualitative improvement "we "benefits each of the" I. "

Family life crises.EG Eidemiller believes that the so-called "normative stressors" pass through the stages of life, i.e. common difficulties that all families experience in an acute form, for example, the labor of mutual adaptation, the formation of relationships with relatives, the upbringing and care of a child, and housekeeping. The combination of these difficulties at certain points in the life cycle leads to family crises. Of undoubted interest are the studies of Czech scientists who have established two "critical" moments in family life.

and. Between the 3rd and 7th years of family development.

The critical moment is most acute between the 4th and 6th years. A leading role is played by changes in emotional relationships, an increase in the number of conflict situations, an increase in tension (as manifestations of difficulties in restructuring emotional relationships between spouses, a reflection of everyday and other difficulties).

b. Between 17 and 25.

The leading role is played by the growth of somatic complaints, anxiety, emptiness of life associated with the separation of children from the family.

Identifying crisis periods in family life is important, especially in order to prevent the emergence of a crisis.

The internet and the media are overflowing with pictures of young and beautiful lovers, but what about those older couples who have been in love for over 50 years? Photographer Lauren Fleishman has created gentle portraits of couples whose love for each other has been fading for half a century and calls the touching series of photographs "The Lovers". Initially, the photographer planned to capture 50 couples, but the project gained momentum, and in the end there were more than a hundred pictures.

Evgeny and Lyubov Kisin

"We met each other at a dance in January 1938. My friend invited me to a party, saying that there would be many beautiful girls. First, a cadet in high boots approached her, but she refused him. Then I dared and also went to her and she agreed to get to know me. I don't know what attracted her more, my face or my uniform. "

Jacob and Maria Shapirstein

"What is the secret of love? The secret is that it is a secret, and I do not reveal my secrets!"

Moses and Tessie Rubinstein

"Every day my wife expresses her love for me. She says," Did I tell you how much I love you today? "

Leon and Harriet Bolotin

"I always knew it would be Harriett."

John and Sherma Campbell

"When your relationship is just beginning, you think that it is simply impossible to love each other more, but love grows, just like your inner world. Now I can say that I love him even more. I can't even imagine my life without him. . "

Joseph and Dorothy Bolotin

"I never think of him in terms of how old we are. I think of it in terms of the good years we lived together. The passionate passion does not last forever. I would say that we are still in love. This is attention, and little nice things. He's an amazing person. "

Fred and Fran Futterman

"You must remember that there were different times. We met in 1939 and we had no money. Our company always met in our friend Betty's basement, we sat there and enjoyed each other's company."

Atig and Golda Pollack

"We knew each other before the war, but we never spoke. He was with other girls because he was much older than me. When we returned from the war, he went to my sister's house, and I lived with her. This August we celebrated our 63rd wedding anniversary. I would say that love came gradually. Not immediately. We were young and he was older, but I liked him. "

Jake and Mary Jacobs

"Jake said to me," Do I have a chance to marry you? " and I said, "Possibly, but not likely!" He knew that I would hardly ever marry him. So when he returned home to Trinidad, his father and mother breathed a sigh of relief. But he wrote to me: "I think I could return to England."

Gino and Angie Terranova

"You don't really think about old age. First of all, you grow old together and when you see a person all the time, you don't notice big changes. I don't think I'm married to an old man and hopefully he feels the same way."

Jin Ling Chen and Lai Mei Chen

"We met when we lived in China. I was on vacation in another city, and we saw each other for three days. We lived very far from each other and when I returned home, we began to write letters to each other. We wrote letters each a week, but they came to us about twenty days. This went on for five years. "

Aldo and Maria de Spagnolis

"When I first saw her, she was 14 and I was 22. Do you have any concerns that she was too young for me? No! Even now I look like a small child! Yes, even now I am still young."

Some are skeptical about the idea of \u200b\u200bliving their whole life with one person, they say "time passes, feelings cool ..." However, the examples of those who truly value their marriage prove the opposite - love does not age, moreover, it gives strength to remain young at heart in any age. These wonderful photos of older couples are a real source of inspiration for anyone who believes in love.

15 PHOTOS

1. An elderly couple from the Russian village of Khalilovo, which is located in the Orenburg region: 65 years of a happy marriage. And look at their faces. They are still in love with each other.
2. They do not care about other people's opinions. They enjoy life despite their venerable age. 3. To the store for shopping. Why not? After all, supermarkets are so boring.
4. This photo is difficult to look at without tears. Together until the end. 5. Youth is a state of mind, not your physiological age. Who said that at 80 you can’t play the fool?
6. The inscription on his T-shirt: "If I get lost, bring me back Jane." The lettering on her T-shirt is "I'm Jane." It remains to add Jane's phone number. 7. Who said that you need to learn only when you are young? It's never too late to learn something new.
8. The trip did not go according to plan. But insurance will cover it all. 9. A sure-fire way to play any woman. By the way, it is a misconception that in nursing homes people simply live out their days in despondency. As the employees of the care for loved ones say (http://pansionat-zabota24.ru/otzyvy/), good nursing homes have a relaxed and even cheerful atmosphere with their own jokes and pleasant leisure.
10. A couple is painting drawings while waiting for dinner. Childhood activity, someone will say? Oh well.
11. An original way to celebrate your 50th wedding anniversary. Sofa, beer and ATV. What else do you need?