Children and money: how to cultivate the right attitude? Children and money. Raising a child's attitude to money

Parents often try to hide money problems from their children, protecting and preserving them in this way. In one case, the parents (and most often the mother, especially if she is raising a child alone) take upon themselves all the difficulties associated with the low security of the family, they try to ensure that the child has everything he needs and even more. On the one hand, it is good when the child does not feel disadvantaged, especially in comparison with peers. But, on the other hand, such a child may show selfishness and not take into account the needs of other family members, believe that first of all his desires should be satisfied.
The same situation occurs if wealthy parents, especially those who left poor families and achieved well-being by their own labor, indulge their children too much, wanting to give them what they themselves lacked. Such a child has everything that only he can wish for, only he does not have the ability to earn money on his own.
The other extreme is the behavior of parents when they overly emotionally demonstrate their concerns. financial condition families. Then the child very often hears: “We cannot buy this, we don’t have money”, “I don’t know what we will live on”, “if we buy it, we will have nothing to eat”. Children, especially small ones, may take such statements too literally, they may have fears. So one child recalled: “My parents, without feeling material need, said that I must remember that“ in one lovely morning“We can wake up beggars. And so I sometimes lay in bed at night, afraid to close my eyes so as not to wake up in the morning in poverty, hunger and cold. "
Older children, especially adolescents, may then begin to negatively relate to the lifestyle of their parents, getting an education, and fixating on the topic of money.
As always, the right approach is in the middle: it is good if the parents calmly and intelligibly explain to the child what the financial difficulties and how the family is going to deal with it.

Commodity money love

Often wealthy and very busy parents believe that "they can give children more than just spend their time on them", because they "work for the sake of children." And the parents are ready to compensate the time saved by communicating with the child "financially", often without understanding that the children do not need money at all.
I remember a proverb that came from China: money can buy a house, but not comfort; hours, but not time; bed, but not sleep; a book, but not knowledge; position, but not respect; medicines, but not health; blood, but not life; sex, but not love.
According to a University of York poll among children aged 11 to 15, teens do not feel more or less happy depending on their parents' income. Happiness is not influenced by size pocket money nor parental salary. What do children need to be happy? It is banal and simple - a family in which they are loved and accepted by everyone.
Even if the father has lost his job, then his baby, as a rule, is more likely than not to be satisfied with the new opportunities for home communication.
When there is no healthy contact between parents and children, and there is a substitution of real emotional relationship"Commodity-money" - money, things, etc., we can get two diametrically opposite options for behavior, depending on the temperament and character of the child.
Children are more active, stubborn, demanding, constant emotional hunger and irritation manifests itself in chronic dissatisfaction and endless demandingness. The child unconsciously tries to "get enough" with the help of money, uncontrollably demanding more and more from the parents and not being satisfied with anything. Whatever you give, whatever you buy - it is always not enough for him, everything quickly becomes boring, something new is required all the time. Such children tend to constantly compare themselves with others and, of course, not in their favor. It seems to them that they are deprived of something, that their parents did not give them something. Parents try to compensate for the lack of deep inner interaction with money, but, of course, to no avail.
Children are less active, rather melancholic, depressive, dependent, unable to express themselves without receiving due from their parents emotional support, not feeling loved, needed, just do not know what to wish for. The child withdraws into himself like a snail, hides in his shell, and no matter how hard the parents try, no matter how hard they try to captivate him, falling asleep with gifts, he does not allow himself to be “lured out”, accepts offerings without much joy, for granted, and none of the expensive thing cannot brighten up his life, compensate for the absence parental love and warmth. From his small, but already bitter experience, he knows that the most important thing - parental attention - he still will not receive, so is it worth even dreaming about something?
In both cases, this is a protest against the replacement real relationship monetary, which, due to the characterological characteristics of children, is expressed in different ways.

Child Control Tool

Often, parents, realizing that the child is financially dependent on them, begin to manipulate this, sometimes unconsciously, using money to influence the child: “if you don’t do what I said, you won’t get a dime”; or: "if you want to do it your own way, go and earn it yourself, here I am in your age ..." refusal to accept them, to take advantage of what the parents have. As a result, all the efforts of the parents are devalued: “for whom did I earn all this? "
Often, parents seem to invest in a child: by investing significant funds, they expect to receive a significant return, and therefore make excessive demands on the child, not taking into account his real capabilities, abilities and desires. And children, willy-nilly, have to justify the funds invested in them and spend their lives on the realization of parental ideas and fantasies.
Another important factor the child's relationship to money is his personal experience in dealing with them.

Child and money

Children and money
Children learn from their parents about their attitude to money and how they handle it by the way parents themselves feel about money. And children watch their parents, learn a lot, draw conclusions.
Initially, the child has no relationship to money. He does not understand that money is the equivalent of goods and services, he does not yet know their value. But you can already talk about these topics with a preschool child: explain at an accessible level where the salary comes from, why they give change in the store, how many sweets or ice cream could be bought with the money that was paid for repairing things broken by the child. You need to explain your actions. For example, that in this moment money is needed for food or for a large general purchase.

Children can have pocket money from the moment when there is a need to spend it on their own and conditions are created for this - as a rule, in the youngest school age... But something is also required from the child. He should more or less understand that money has to be earned and that this is a lot of work. In families in which parents tell their children about their work, they can show this understanding already in the first grade.

It's good when, together with the transition to " monetary relations»The responsibilities of the child increase. If he considers himself old enough to spend money at his own discretion, it means that he has grown up to some household chores. And, of course, the amount we assign to a child depends on the family's income. If the family's capabilities are limited, the parent can calmly and clearly explain to the child what the financial difficulties are and how the family is going to cope with them.

It is very important to be honest about children. family budget... After all, when children, with tears in their eyes, beg their parents to buy them a player or a jacket with a hood, and parents tell them that there is no money, this is not always true. But if there is money, the children cannot but guess about it, and therefore they expect at least an honest answer from their parents, without which they find it themselves. Here's what is interesting: when there is really no money in the house, the children know about it and rarely beg for the most necessary things.

In some families, children receive money for good grades or for doing some household chores. Psychologists, as a rule, do not recommend paying for grades and help around the house: a child who is accustomed to monetary rewards may very soon be reluctant to learn history or wash dishes for “just like that”. After all, an interest in learning or an awareness of the need for economic affairs can be replaced solely by the desire for money. All this does not mean that there is no need to celebrate the success of a son or daughter in school or other matters. But emotional reward is preferable. Praise or Graduation Gift school year will be very useful - as a recognition of the merits and labors of the child, as a sign of attention to his affairs.

Money is one of the most discussed and controversial topics. Some consider them evil and the source of all problems, others rave about wealth. Where is the truth? And everyone has their own. And before you educate correct attitude children to money, you need to take some position yourself.

Moreover, it is important to find a balance so that money is neither a cult nor an evil. Indeed, in fact, they do not carry anything bad, and all the problems are in ourselves. Does money sponsored to build hospitals and support orphanages bring evil? Know their value and learn how to handle them correctly.

Well, what kind of attitude or financial education can we talk about if the child constantly sees fierce arguments between parents about the family budget and recrimination? Such behavior will lead to the fact that the child will grow up greedy and petty or absolutely not adapted to life in modern society... Do you want that? Then let's learn parenting financially together.

The first lessons on educating a child's correct attitude to money can be started as early as 5-7 years old. It is at this age that the baby shows interest in numbers, uses the drawn money in his games, and finds very unexpected solutions for their use.

The first step may be to involve the child in planning the family budget. Ability to correctly calculate the costs of next week and think over the options for saving, will become a reliable foundation for starting an independent life.

Show your kid how to divide the required payments into groups: mandatory (rent, food and clothing, sport sections and so on), desired (going to a cafe, circus, theater), savings (put aside for a car, rest) and optional (toys, sweets).

Knowing how much money is spent, the baby can learn to plan. Put common goal save a certain amount and think together how this can be achieved. And don't forget to assign a prize for achieving the goal. This practice will teach you a lot. You can't even imagine how much easier it will be for a child in adulthood.

At the age of 6-7, invite your child to start saving money. Not only will this be another step towards the ability to treat money correctly, but it will also help the baby become more independent.

The only caveat is that you need to correctly set the goal of accumulation, otherwise this activity can quickly get bored. Let the baby save for a very coveted toy.

Hope you're not waiting to come of age? The first pocket money should be allocated from the age of 6-7. So at least he will have something to learn from.

Explain to your child what money is in your pocket and give freedom of choice. Let him decide: buy ice cream or sweets. Or maybe put some of them off for the latest designer.

They need to be issued once a week on a specific day. Moreover, the amount should never vary. It can only grow with age, but not with increased costs.

Some parents practice rewarding their child for a job done or good performance in school. Of course it's tempting, but don't forget about back side medals. Your task is to interest the baby in studies, and not in possible reward.

Useful information. My daughter is 6 years old - must try

I was born just at the time of perestroika. There was not enough money. It was not convenient to ask as it was, it would be better if they gave a certain amount and I would give orders. They never refused, they said if necessary somewhere. ask, we will give. But my desire to work and be independent became very great. I have a commercial streak)

The topic of raising children to have the right attitude to money, of course, worries many parents. And this is absolutely justified, because while we live in the material world, money has a significant impact on our entire life and the lives of our children.

However, we must admit that we can teach our children to properly interact with money only to the extent that we ourselves have mastered these important skills. That is why every parent considers it necessary to inculcate the attitude towards money that he himself professes. But after all, it has long been no secret that our life corresponds to the beliefs that we accept in our hearts.

Now is the time to consider whether your own beliefs and attitudes about money are constructive, whether these beliefs and habits help build a happy, secure life, whether money is your helpmate or it is it that leads you. And the most main question- what do you want by talking to them about money or touching on this topic in daily interaction with your child?

Unfortunately, many parents consider it their duty to teach children how to save money, not demand much, they teach them the idea that making money is hard work... Of course, there is some truth in this. But there is another side, and here it is very important how the same principles are presented to the child. How are the dogmas? Or is he given the opportunity to see and appreciate different variants relationship with money?

What is yours main goal in the formation of the child's money scenario. Do you want you to have less headaches now when you walk past shop windows or do you really want your child to learn to value money just as much as it is necessary for a comfortable arrangement of his life? I will clarify that when I talk about comfort, I do not mean a pile of material wealth or life according to the principle "Do not deny yourself anything!"

Where can I get the answers to these and yours? own questions about this, you ask. precisely in order to find answers to exciting questions and maybe try to shift your own negative beliefs about money we have organized for you.

You can listen to his recording right here, and if after that you still have questions, do not hesitate to ask them.

The topic is, indeed, very important and multifaceted, so starting from one side, you soon realize that there is still endless scope for research ahead.

Money is one of the most discussed and controversial topics. Some consider them evil and the source of all problems, others rave about wealth. Where is the truth? And everyone has their own. And before you bring up the correct attitude of children to money, you need to take some position yourself.

Moreover, it is important to find a balance so that money is neither a cult nor an evil. Indeed, in fact, they do not carry anything bad, and all the problems are in ourselves. Does money sponsored to build hospitals and support orphanages bring evil? Know their value and learn how to handle them correctly.

Children's attitude to money

Well, what kind of attitude or financial education can we talk about if the child constantly sees fierce arguments between parents and recriminations? Such behavior will lead to the fact that the child will grow up greedy and petty or absolutely not adapted to life in modern society. Do you want that? Then let's learn parenting financially together.

We draw up a budget

The first lessons on educating a child's correct attitude to money can be started as early as 5-7 years old. It is at this age that the baby shows interest in numbers, uses the drawn money in his games, and finds very unexpected solutions for their use.

The first step may be to involve the child in planning the family budget. The ability to correctly calculate the costs for the next week and think over the options for saving will become a reliable foundation for starting an independent life.

Show your kid how to divide the necessary payments into groups: obligatory (rent, food and clothing, sports clubs, etc.), desired (going to a cafe, circus, theater), savings (put aside for a car, rest) and optional (toys, sweets) ...

Knowing how much money is spent, the baby can learn to plan. Set a joint goal of saving a certain amount and think together how you can achieve this. And don't forget to assign a prize for achieving the goal. This practice will teach you a lot. You can't even imagine how much easier it will be for a child in adulthood.

Making savings

At the age of 6-7, invite your child to start saving money. Not only will this be another step towards the ability to treat money correctly, but it will also help the baby.

The only caveat is that you need to correctly set the goal of accumulation, otherwise this activity can quickly get bored. Let the baby save for a very coveted toy.

Pocket money

Hope you're not waiting to come of age? The first pocket money should be allocated from the age of 6-7. So at least he will have something to learn from.

Explain to your child what money is in your pocket and give freedom of choice. Let him decide: buy ice cream or sweets. Or maybe postpone some of them for the newest one.

They need to be issued once a week on a specific day. Moreover, the amount should never vary. It can only grow with age, but not with increased costs.

How not to do

Some parents practice rewarding their child for a job done or good performance in school. It's tempting, of course, but don't forget about the other side of the coin. Your task is to interest the baby in studies, and not in possible reward.