How to calm and console a girl with words from a distance when she feels bad. What to do in a difficult situation and how to support a girl

Probably every guy sooner or later has a moment when he needs to calm a girl down. The female sex is an emotional being, subject to strong experiences in various situations. If you know how to console your significant other, it will be a plus for both of you.

Before you take any steps, find out what happened to your friend. You must clearly distinguish 2 different situations:

  1. These could be simple whims with the help of which a girl is trying to manipulate you.
  2. Something really serious happened to her. For example, family troubles, retaking an exam, etc.

When you shouldn't calm a girl down

This is just the first case. For example, you did something, she pretended that she didn’t like it very much and started a scandal. The purpose of such whims is provocation: so that you apologize, feel guilty, and, perhaps, make amends for your “guilt” financially.

Try to look from the outside at your action, which caused such a strong reaction in the girl. If it seems to you that everything is fine, then it is. Do not give in to provocation and do not take any action. Next time, your friend will know that you don’t fall for such things.

When should a girl be calmed down?

Talk to her, find out what happened. Sometimes just sharing her problem will make things easier. Depending on the situation, proceed further: first, hug her. This helps a lot, because hugs make a girl feel protected and calm. Then, after you understand what the situation is, express your opinion on this matter.

How to calm a girl down with words

Try to look at her problem from an optimistic point of view and tell her that not everything is as bad as she thinks. Offer a possible solution to the situation and let her understand that you will support her in every possible way and will do everything possible to ensure that the situation returns to normal. Even if you don’t know what solution to offer in her question, nevertheless try to make it clear that the situation can be resolved one way or another.

Use the following lines in your conversation:

"Everything will be fine"

"You are not alone, you have me"

"You can always count on my help"

How to calm a girl down from a distance

If the girl is not around, keep in constant contact with her via phone, messenger, social network. Try to make her have the impression that, despite the distance, you are close to her. Tell her that if she feels uneasy again, she’ll call you right away and you’ll support her.

How to calm a crying girl

You just need to hug a crying girl tightly and stay with her in this position for up to several minutes. While she's crying, it's even better not to say much. In your arms she will calm down quite quickly, and then you can talk to her.

How to console a girl

To make your girlfriend feel at peace, you first need to take non-verbal actions. That is, those with fewer words. To do this, use hugs, touches, kisses, stroking. In the room where you are, create a calming environment: close the curtains, light an aroma lamp with essential oil (it perfectly calms the psyche). You can do water treatments - take a bath together.

After the girl has come to her senses, you can go out into the fresh air, take a walk, or go to a cafe. This will help change the situation and distract you from different thoughts.

Many guys and men don't know how calm down and comfort a girl who is crying or who just needs your support. We are all emotional people, but girls clearly express their emotions and if you can calm and console the girl, then most likely this will be a big plus, both when meeting and already in a relationship.

In this article you will learn how calm down and comfort a girl who is crying, who needs support and understanding. In general, all girls and women want to find a guy or man who can understand them, so if you have such a gift, then you will have the opportunity to seduce and make any girl or woman fall in love with you.

To calm and console a girl with words, you first need to ask her what happened to her, why she is crying or sad. Any girl, even a stranger, if you just approach her and ask, will answer you. Then, once you know what the problem is, ask if you can help her with anything. Many girls will not mind your help, but it’s not a fact that a girl may reject you, but you shouldn’t be afraid, you need to try.

If you want to calm a girl down by phone or SMS if she is feeling unwell, then in any case you just need to ask her the cause of the problem and find out what is the reason for her concern. If you by nature know how to understand people, then everything will be easier; if not, then show a desire to understand the girl and try to calm her down verbally.

To calm the girl down on the phone, just call her and try to help her solve this problem first, and then try to cheer her up, invite her somewhere and distract her from what makes her feel so bad.

To reassure a girl via SMS, if she is feeling bad, then write something nice that could solve the problem if you know the reason. If you do not know the cause of concern, then it is better to call and see. There is no need to deceive her and yourself; if you really want to help and calm her down, then already in the process of communication you will know her problem and the way to solve it.

Every person knows on a subconscious level how to solve this or that problem, but emotions often prevent us from calming down and concentrating on solving the problem. That's why you need calm the girl down so that she can find answers to her questions herself.

To calm down a crying girl, just go up to her and ask why she is crying, when she answers, tell her not to be upset, life goes on. Try to understand her deeply and discuss together the reason why she is crying. Support is important and necessary for every person, especially at such moments. A girl will never forget you if you help her and understand her.

To console a girl, you don’t need to flatter her, if you are ready to help and understand her, then act, if there is no such desire and only selfishness creeps into your thoughts, then get away from it. When your soul screams at you that this girl needs help, then be sure to try to understand the girl, console and calm her down.

Believe me, all a girl needs in any situation when she feels pain, suffering, disappointment and sadness is the support of someone. Even when a girl has a strong character, sooner or later she can break and give up.


Therefore, to console and calm the girl down, behave like a real man who is able to help, protect and understand the girl, even if she is not familiar to you. Never leave a girl in trouble alone, if you help today, they will help you tomorrow, remember, no one is immune from problems and everyone has them.

Before you pass by a girl who needs help, think about how bad she is and remember how you felt in such a situation, this will help to console and calm the girl. If you don’t have such experience, then at least just stay nearby and support her.

psycho- olog. ru

Man is a strong-willed creature, capable of overcoming hardships and hardships in the name of his goal. But it happens that even strong-willed people give up and fall into the tenacious clutches of depression and apathy. How to cheer up a girl what if she feels bad?

Find the reason

First, you need to find the reason for the girl’s bad mood at all costs, and only then eliminate this reason. There is no point in advising anything here, because a girl can be offended by literally any little thing that you wouldn’t even pay attention to. Analyze the situation and find this most annoying factor, and then eliminate it so that your significant other’s mood does not deteriorate again.

Remember wisdom

Remember that it is necessary to be able to distinguish between things that we have the opportunity to change and those that we need to come to terms with. Tell your girlfriend about it.

Avoid Negative Review

To cheer up a girl, try choose the right expressions, otherwise you risk upsetting her even more, even if you didn’t put an ounce of malicious intent into your words. Here are two examples of encouraging phrases:

1) A bad example: “But it’s in your blood to leave everything until the last day, and even ask later for help”;
2) A good example: “So many things have accumulated, it’s terrible - let me help you.”

You just need to criticize in time

But if a girl has something to criticize for, if she constantly does something wrong and gets into trouble because of it, what should she do?? Then constructive criticism is, of course, necessary, but it should be used after you help to your friend with her affairs and thereby lift her spirits.

Hug more often

Psychologists advise hugging more often, if you want to cheer up a loved one, because close physical contact (read: hugs) improves the state of mind, and this, by the way, has been proven. You can give the girl a massage that will relax her and take away bad thoughts. Even if you just slightly knead the collar area with your hands, that is, the neck and the part of the back adjacent to it, this will improve blood flow to the head, which in turn will have a beneficial effect on brain function.

Treat me to something sweet

Chocolate is a great mood booster, and this statement also does not need substantiation. So if your loved one is upset, treat her to a small bar of chocolate and she will quickly get back to normal..

Hello dear readers. Today we will talk about how to calm a crying girl. You will learn how to distinguish between true crying and a method of manipulation. You will know what the sequence of actions should be in such a situation. You will learn how to behave when a girl is close and when she is far away.

Sincere tears or a method of manipulation

When a girl throws a tantrum and starts crying a lot, it is important to decide whether there are really good reasons for this or whether this is an attempt to manipulate a man.

  1. If the tears are sincere, then the girl will not stop crying after she hears that you are ready to give her something as a consolation. But during manipulation, the young lady can say out loud what she needs in order to be comforted.
  2. If a young lady calls the reason for her tears that you don’t love her enough, and says that you can prove the opposite if you refuse to go fishing with your friends, then this is one hundred percent manipulation.
  3. If tears appear immediately after some controversial issue, most likely the girl is behaving feignedly, trying to make you feel guilty by such an act.

If you notice that a young lady is manipulating, you must explain to her in a decisive but gentle manner that such behavior is unacceptable, that no one will run at her beck and call. If you don’t calm down, you will be forced to take a break from the relationship or break it off altogether. You need to talk to her seriously only after she has calmed down and is able to soberly assess the current situation.

Sequencing

  1. Take a good look at the current situation. You must understand that there are many reasons that could cause a girl's tears. Think about whether you were the reason for her crying. And in general, is your help appropriate at the moment? There is no need to interfere if you yourself are upset; a girl’s tears are a manifestation of happiness or she is crying because she is offended by you.
  2. Make an attempt to calm the girl down, talk, become a good listener if she enters into dialogue. Do not use phrases like “If I were you...” or “When I found myself in a similar situation, I acted differently.”
  3. There is no need to persuade a girl to stop crying. You must understand that tears are a release of emotions, especially if something serious has happened.
  4. Try to share her sadness. Choose the right words: “I’m so sorry this happened,” “I guess you’re in a lot of pain right now,” “I’m not surprised that you’re so upset,” “the problem is really serious.”
  5. Use nonverbal techniques. For a girl, eye contact, correct facial expressions on your face, and tilting your head in her direction will be important.
  6. Hug a girl if you know she needs it. Take her hand or kiss her forehead. Assess the need for physical contact by the girl’s behavior; perhaps this is just what she is waiting for.
  7. Don't try to solve her problem, offer your help. Show your concern for her.

If a girl is nearby

When a young lady is upset, it is undesirable to behave as follows:

  • try to cheer up with empty phrases;
  • hope that after a while she will stop crying;
  • persistently try to find out the reason for this behavior;
  • give the girl a sedative.

If there is a girl nearby who is hysterical, then you need to do the following.

  1. Pat her on the back, run your hand through her hair, hug her and hold her tightly to you. It is important for a girl to feel that there is a person next to her who is not indifferent to what she is going through now. Such a step will calm you down, make you feel not alone, and understand that you are under your protection. But you shouldn’t press it too hard so as not to break the ribs.
  2. Show that you care about her. Prepare your favorite drink or just bring a glass of water.
  3. Throw a warm blanket over your girlfriend to make her feel more comfortable. Of course, if it’s a hot season outside, then it’s better to open the window to let in fresh air.
  4. When the young lady comes to her senses, you can carefully inquire about the reason for what happened, but there is no need to put pressure or beg her too much. It is strictly forbidden to raise your voice or engage in interrogation.
  5. Having learned about the cause of the incident, it is necessary to act according to the circumstances.

You can also use another method to calm a crying girl.

  1. Tell her how much you value her, show sincere interest in her problem.
  2. When you find out the reason for the tears, do not mock or belittle its importance in the girl’s eyes, no matter how strange it may be. Otherwise, you will only upset her even more.
  3. Ask the girl how you can help her. Say that you will gladly do everything in your power.
  4. Stay close until she calms down. If she needs to be alone, give her personal space. But don’t go too far, in case she needs your support.
  5. You can try to distract the girl from her worries by suggesting a walk in the park or going to a cafe. It is very important to ensure that the young lady does not become depressed.
  6. If you live together, create a cozy atmosphere at home.

If she's far away

When a guy is at a distance from an upset girl, he can try to calm her down with the help of modern technologies, for example, to console her via SMS or write something on a social network, or call her by phone.

  1. You need to worry about her condition in a gentle manner. Don't be surprised if the girl shows some aggression. You shouldn't respond like that, be more tolerant. Perhaps the young lady is simply angry because you are not with her now and cannot hug her and console her in person. In such a situation, it is important to use your behavior and the right phrases to show invaluable care and calm the girl down with your words.
  2. It is strictly unacceptable while talking on the phone to mock your loved one’s problem; if she bursts into tears, laugh at her tears. After such an act, the girl will no longer contact you.
  3. You can please the young lady with a surprise. This will take her mind off her problems and make her laugh. For example, you can post a picture of a cute cat on her wall on a social network or write some funny quotes. It will be especially pleasant to receive flowers through a courier service, which will be delivered right to her door. You can also simply place a targeted order at a pizzeria or restaurant. It is important that the girl feels that she is remembered and cared for.
  4. If the girl is upset due to problems with her health or, perhaps, has lost someone close, you need to provide moral support. If possible, come to her to personally support her.
  5. It is unacceptable to tell a young lady that she is behaving incorrectly or reacting illogically. Such an approach will only irritate her.
  6. If, when communicating on the phone, you don’t know what to say or what words to calm a girl who is crying, then it’s better to remain silent. But there is no need to say a phrase like “Don’t be upset, everything will be fine.” This will only upset her more. The girl will conclude that you are simply in a hurry to end the conversation.
  7. When reassuring your pen pal, it is important to let her know that she can count on your help and support at any time. Within reason, of course.
  1. In any situation, it is important that the girl receives a willingness to listen and empathy from the guy. The most effective thing you can offer her is attention and your participation.
  2. Don’t forget that tears are just a form of communication, a manifestation of some feelings or problems.
  3. You don't need to take your girlfriend's troubles too seriously and start getting depressed along with her. You must be strong and support her.
  4. If you notice that a girl cries too often, and for no apparent reason, most likely, this condition may be a symptom of an anxiety disorder, depression, or the presence of a phobia. In this case, it is better to consult a psychologist.
  5. Sometimes a girl needs to be allowed to cry, to throw out her emotions. In this way he can cope with his stress.
  6. There is no need to fuss and be nervous, or worry too much. You must be a support and support for her, so you must remain serious and stand firmly on your feet.
  7. There is no need to cajole the girl with gifts or promise to do everything she wants. So, the young lady will understand that with her tears she can get what she wants, and in the future she will often resort to such blackmail.

When one of our friends is sad, we experience a completely understandable desire to cheer her up; but sometimes it can be quite difficult to do it correctly, so as not to inadvertently offend her and ruin her mood even more. Much depends on the degree of your friendly closeness and the actual reason for her sadness. For example, if you yourself ruined her mood (perhaps you quarreled, and only then you realized that you were wrong), then you will have to make more efforts to cheer up your friend.

There may, of course, be other reasons, and there may be many of them. A friend's recent divorce, news of a serious illness, or the death of a loved one... Of course, when your best friend is upset, it can be very painful for you. Regardless of the reason, if you are patient and understanding, you can quickly find a way to cheer her up. We are also ready to offer several ways in which you can help your friend get through difficult times, feeling the warmth of your shoulder. Moreover, we will consider different situations.

How to cheer up a friend when she's upset about something

Let’s say you feel that your beloved friend is sad, but you don’t see a clear reason. Or maybe you just don’t know about her. What can be done in this situation?

  • Ask her why her mood changes

    Just try to ask the question in a way that makes her feel you care; Using insincere words or a patronizing tone will only upset her even more. Listen to the answer without interrupting, even if at that moment you yourself become the object of her criticism (if it was you who offended her with some action or careless words). Resist the temptation to parry her attacks or become defensive. Regardless of the reason for her sadness, it is very important to become a good listener. By doing this, you will show your friend your special attitude towards her, your desire to understand and help.

  • Offer your girl your support

    Let your friend know that she can count on you, even if she is not yet ready to ask you for it.

  • Give her the opportunity to be inside her shell if she doesn't want to talk about what happened yet.

    Stop asking her and just try to distract her from sad thoughts. You can’t get into a person’s soul if he doesn’t want to let you in.

  • Show that you sympathize with her condition

    It doesn’t matter how you do it - with words or actions - the main thing is that your friend sees your empathy. The trouble is that one of the most natural reactions of people to the bad mood of loved ones is to pretend to be emotionally deaf or even try to defend themselves by taking a defensive stance. Don't give in to this temptation. Your friend's anger or dissatisfaction may not be directed at you at all. Instead, tell her: “I know you haven’t had an easy day and you seem to be too tired. Is there anything I could do for you? Or: “I feel like you’re angry. Tell me what's going on?

  • If a girl wants to tell you about what upset her, then listen carefully to her

    This is the best thing you can do for your friend at first when she is upset about something. Let her pour out her soul, take some of the weight off her. Don't try to give advice right away. If you're not sure, don't hesitate to ask your friend if she just wants to vent or if she wants your opinion.

  • Do something for your friend that she loves.

    Not only will this be good for the obvious reason that it will help relieve your beloved friend's sadness, but it will also help show your sympathy and love for her if your friend is not yet willing to talk about what is depressing her. And sometimes it can help find out what really happened.

  • Give her something of yourself, share something meaningful.

    It doesn't have to be something material; This could be taking time out of your busy schedule to meet and talk with an upset girl, or changing plans for the weekend when you drop everything and go to a friend's house to take her to a movie or a cafe. When you sacrifice something for her that you wouldn't do in another situation, it will tell your friend that you are willing to help her. This way she won't feel too lonely.

  • Invite your friend to do some urgent, important task for her that she doesn’t have the strength or mood to do right now.

    Of course, you cannot solve all her problems for her, but you can help solve one issue on her list. You can run to the store for a friend, wash the dishes for her, or pay her bills. Often what worries a person - lack of time for household chores or difficulties at work - is an additional source of tension for him. If you know what exactly is depressing your friend, offer her your help. Helping her can greatly improve her mood. Even if she refuses your help, the very fact that you care about her will support her spirit.

  • Take some time to distract your friend from her dark thoughts.

    Invite her to go for a walk. Sometimes a simple walk in the park can lift your spirits. Chat about something pleasant for you, such as reminiscing about the fun adventures you had together. Sit in a cafe, tasting delicious cakes. Who else but you should know that we girls are able to get into a good mood at the mere sight of sweets! Perhaps this is the easiest and most pleasant way to cheer up a girl.

  • Call on all your humor to help

    Try to make fun of yourself if it is appropriate during the conversation. Such jokes can not only amuse both of you, but also make you more approachable in the eyes of your interlocutor. It will be easier for her to trust you if she wants to talk. So make fun of yourself - what you won’t do for the sake of your beloved friend!

    You can also watch a good comedy together. Watching the funny adventures of the heroes, the girl will be distracted from her own sad thoughts. Watching an evening of humor on TV will also be very helpful. In general, try to make your friend smile. Our brain is accustomed to associate certain actions with their corresponding emotions, and if you smile, the brain will give the command: “Be happy!” You can improve your mood by simply smiling, even to yourself.

    Use humor, jokes, anecdotes, but just make sure that your choice is correct. If you make jokes too early and out of place, you risk appearing insensitive. However, if you know your friend well, you can always make her laugh.

  • Listen to music together

    No other form of art is capable of influencing our subconscious as much as music. Just do not turn on songs that are sad or capable of causing sad emotions: your mood will “follow” the music. A sad song will make your friend feel even worse, while a happy song will make her forget about her worries, at least for a while.

  • Involve your friend in fussing with a pet, yours or hers.

    Animals usually feel the mood of their owners, and if a friend is sad, then her pet is probably huddled in a corner. Get your pet excited, involve him in the game - and your friend, of course, too. Kiss and cuddle the animal - the smallest sign of love from a cute little creature can turn your gloomy day into the warmest and sunniest.

  • Give your friend a small gift that has emotional rather than practical value.

    Create a mix of the girl’s favorite songs, for example, and burn them to a disc. Bring her her favorite flowers. Buy her a CD of her favorite movie. You can come up with many such cute little things that you can use to please your beloved friend.

How to make a girl laugh on the phone

Sometimes talking on the phone is all it takes to lift a girl's spirits. Of course, if she is in a very bad mood, she may not want to pick up the phone. Then we remember the above recommendations and fly to her home. And if she answered the phone, but didn’t show much desire to talk, then after just a few minutes of your “speeches” (necessarily in optimistic tones!) she will cheer up and even thank you for your persistence.

  • Talk to your friend with a smile in your voice

    Smile when you talk to her because it will show in your intonation and it will help improve her mood. A smile will radiate your kindness, which will show that you want to take care of her. It's always nice to know that someone cares about you!

  • You can ask her about the reason for her bad mood; but don't feel rejected if she doesn't want to talk about it

    Usually girls want to express their feelings and experiences, especially if what hurt her soul happened recently. But if your friend is secretive, then you shouldn’t invade her personal space, trying to force her to be frank.

  • If your friend, on the contrary, is too immersed in experiencing troubles, carefully shift the conversation to some fun topic

    Take her mind off her worries and make her laugh. Come up with a funny story that supposedly happened to you, or tell about a funny trick your child or pet did. This will help you cheer her up.

  • Again, invite her to get out of the house and go somewhere together

    The best way would be to spend the time somehow having fun - eating ice cream in a nearby cafe or dancing with friends at someone's party.

How to cheer up a girl with low self-esteem

Regardless of the reason why your friend or acquaintance feels insecure in life, often being in a bad mood because of this, it is in your power to teach her to be happy. Show her that every girl deserves to be appreciated. Give her a boost to her self-esteem by keeping her motivated, and she will stop feeling sad and frowning. Here's what you can do for her:

  • Start the day with an unexpected surprise

    Greet her with a happy and friendly message on your mobile phone. Send a smiley face or some cute picture by email. Bring her colorful balloons. There can be many ideas!

  • Talk to her privately, using upbeat, energetic tones.

    If this is your employee or classmate, then praise her for a job well done or for her attractive appearance. Ask how things are going and give her the opportunity to express her concerns. Help her feel more confident, it will definitely improve her mood.

  • If this is your close friend, help her identify her best and greatest strengths.

    Make a big collage together, pasting in pictures that represent her best qualities. Add your own contribution to this collage, indicating those character traits that your friend does not notice in herself. Illustrate all her good deeds that she does for other people. Hang this collage in her room - it's guaranteed to lift her spirits. And at the same time self-esteem!

Every girl's life has its ups and downs. Whether it's due to major life changes, personal tragedy, or just minor upsets, there are times when she needs support, companionship, and friendly warmth. All that is required of you at this moment is to simply let her know that you will do everything necessary to cheer her up. And then someone will also come to your aid if your mood falls “below the plinth”!

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